The Mastery of Love
By Don Miguel Ruiz
Preface: I have been on the path of spirituality for quite some time now, starting yoga in my early 20s, then learning Reiki, Qigong, and trying lots of different healing techniques. What I know is that it doesn’t happen overnight, and it is part of the maturation process. You will be given your revelations when you are ready for them, and there is no way to speed up the process. Simply stick with what your heart tells you and keep going. It is a personal experience unique to yourself. What follows is my own experience and thoughts on the matter of LOVE.
LOVE is within YOU
When I came back from a roving yoga retreat in the Indian Himalayas in July this year, I noticed I felt different. I was happy and content to be at home with my dog, entertaining myself. I was without worry or fear of the future. I was in the present moment. People around me were upset by the events unfolding in their lives and I would just say, believing it was true, “Everything is going to be OK”.
Something happened in India – I can’t say whether it was one specific moment or a culmination of the whole experience over 4 weeks, or meeting certain people at the right time. I found love inside myself. I didn’t need to look for it outside of myself, which meant I didn’t need the approval of others. This gave me the freedom to not care about what others thought of me, which gave me the freedom to do whatever I wanted, to follow my heart truly.
I thought this feeling might wear-off, like a post-holiday buzz. But it didn’t. It certainly was not unshakable in difficult moments, but it was still there, a foundation for living in a different way. I am not claiming to be the most joyous person alive, rather that I have a feeling of equanimity – I feel contentment regardless of what is happening around me.
Staying with my cousin in San Francisco a couple of weeks ago, we were talking about matters of the heart and he suggested I read a book called The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz. He loaned me his copy and I read it excitedly – it made complete sense of my path and my recent transformation of perception. I soon understood that my time in India was very much part of the “freedom” process, but I had been working my way towards this new growth for a long time.
Ruiz writes in a most beautiful and easy-to-read manner, explaining concepts that speak truth about how we grow up in a society that teaches us that there is an ideal of perfection that ultimately makes us feel that we are not good enough. We grow up with beliefs that create painful reactions to life events. We walk around with “sores” on our emotional body that hurt painfully when touched by someone else. In response to this we build up images of ourselves to cover these sores. We get further and further away from knowing who we really are, from owning our own truth.
The answer to finding your own happiness is to find the love in yourself. Accept that you have pain like everyone else – it is a normal condition of human life. Don‘t feel guilt or shame about it. Get on with your life. Love yourself now – you are perfect already. Ruiz explains “What makes you happy is love coming out of you. And if you are generous with your love, everyone is going to love you. You are never going to be alone if you are generous.”
Read the book and discover for yourself how your heart can open to the wide world.
Here is one of my favourite songs on living in the moment, from the album LOVE by Jason Mraz. I find his music heart-opening and a great way to relieve stress. LISTEN ON YOUTUBE
Molly Furzer has been practising yoga since 1999 and teaching since 2007. She teaches gentle yoga to adults, Kids & Family Yoga, and Laughter Wellness. Molly also offers intuitive energy healing in private sessions.